Awkward
by MissCHSparkles
Summary: While watching the original G1 Transformer series, have you ever noticed just how many silly, corny an awkward moments there are? This is a series of chapters which expand on those awkward moments with suggestions very welcome and needed. First chapter, Rumble grabbing Sparkplug for a bit too long in one of the first episodes.


_Author's note. While the original Transformer series was brilliant, it was also extremely corny and rather silly at times. But let's face it, that's why we loved that._

_I was inspired to write these little shorts after watching the Nostalgia Critic's review of the series but I need suggestions. Any silly or awkward scene that you can think of please let me know._

_Enjoy and please review._

There were screams and cries as the giant robot monstrosities rampaged about the oil rig. Nothing any of the human workers did made the slightest difference; they were cast aside like they were mean insects. The red eyed robots appeared to be after the very oil they were drilling and were somehow creating some sort of strange glowing fuel from it.

Sparkplug barely had time to comprehend this; he'd been separated from his son Spike and was desperately trying to get back to him. But there were at least two of the robots between them and with shots ringing out and bits of debris flying everywhere, it was impossible to get to him. Sparkplug tried to run around them but his way was blocked so he tried to go in the other direction.

But at that moment, a small robot landed in his path with a heavy crash. This one was a light purple colour and only slightly taller than Sparkplug himself. Compared to the other robots, this one was miniscule and Sparkplug briefly wondered whether it was a child. However, the malicious expression on its face told him otherwise.

Before he could run away, the small robot had grabbed him by the shoulders and swung him around to slam into a metal wall. With the breath half knocked out of him, all Sparkplug could do was clutch at his captor as it sneered at him.

"Well, what have I got here?" it asked evilly in what appeared to be a male voice but Sparkplug honestly had no idea if this thing was male.

"Uh...hhh," Sparkplug gasped as he was pressed hard against the hard surface of the storage container.

"Primus, you fleshlings are ugly," the robot taunted even as the destruction continued all around them. "But I bet you're fun to play with."

And to Sparkplug's horror, the robot now pressed up against him, all the while leering. Sparkplug felt himself grow hot and sweat begin to form on his forehead. Just what were these horrors that had attacked them?

"DAD!"

He started as his son's voice cried out and the next moment, there was a thump as Spike collided with the robot holding him. However, the robot just turned his head although mildly surprised by the intrusion before using one arm to swat Spike away. Sparkplug tried to use the opportunity to struggle free but he was too pinned and a moment later, the robot's free hand was gripping him again.

"He's ugly too but a little cuter," the robot now informed him cruelly. "Maybe I'll give him to my brother as a present, make a great little pet."

"You leave my son alone," Sparkplug snarled in spite of him, his face flushed with anger and fear.

"Oh, feisty," the robot laughed as he pinned the helpless human's body even more firmly to the wall. "I like that."

"Uh," Sparkplug stammered as the robot leaned in closer. "W-what are you doing?"

"Having fun, fleshy," the robot taunted as it brushed its cold metal lips over his cheek.

Sparkplug shuddered and tried to turn his head away, to avoid those awful lips. Sadly for him, moving his head was all he could do and it wasn't difficult for the robot to move with his head. Its lips trailed close and closer to his until he thought he'd scream with terror and horror.

"Mmm, warm," the robot murmured in mild surprise and alarmingly, pleasure. "Maybe you squishies are good for something after all. And you're so small, so no one but my brother and I can have you."

Sparkplug did not like the way the robot's eyes lit up with glee, although a part of him wondered at that last line. By the sounds of it, those bigger robots usually got all the best goods and this small robot was happy that for once, he'd get exactly what he wanted. Not that that filled Sparkplug with a lot of joy, it just made him more worried. Because it sounded like this robot would not let him go easily and might be going after his son next.

"Get off me," he hissed, wondering where Spike was and if he was alright. He suspected his son had been stunned by the blow but was worried he might have been grabbed by one of those other robots.

"Oh no," purred the robot as its lips found the corner of his. "Not until I've had my fun."

"No..." Sparkplug started to say but was cut off as the robot's lips slid over his and pressed down hard. Any protest Sparkplug could have made, was now completely muffled.

He froze in complete and utter shock, he couldn't move. The robot's lips were rough but not as cold as he was expecting. He could feel a strong, bitter scent of some sort of fuel and knew it was the robot's breath...if it even had breath. He closed his eyes in a vain attempt to escape from what was happening, anything to avoid that robot's sneering, triumphant gaze but he couldn't escape the reality of it all.

Had his son been captured by this little devil's brother, was he being assaulted in the same fashion? Sparkplug dearly hoped not as he vainly tried to push his captor away but the robot's grip tightened painfully on him until he was forced to give up. The only thing he could do was remain silent, to preserve what little dignity he had left and minimise the pleasure the robot was getting from all of this.

The man felt something touch the inner part of his lower lip and almost gagged as he realised it must be the creature's tongue. It was enough that he almost threw up right into the robot's mouth but somehow forced it down. He doubted the robot would appreciate it and might even turn nasty. Right now, survival was important if only so he could protect his son from these creatures.

"_Dear God,"_ he thought to himself, the seconds were fast turning into minutes or so it felt to him. _"Please let him stop..."_

With a slightly wet sound, the robot suddenly pulled away from him and Sparkplug was so startled, that he opened his eyes. The robot was smirking at him, regardless of the trickle of spit trailing from its lip corner. Sparkplug just stared at him, disgust and belief raging through him. He liked to consider himself an unprejudiced kind of man but he was definitely a straight man. And the fact that another male, even a robot, had just _kissed _him was beyond the pale.

"_Get off me,"_ he suddenly snarled, pushing at the robot with all his strength and actually managed to drive him a couple of steps back.

This was mostly because of fact the robot had let him go and had just been sneering at him, also because his actions caught it by surprise. But as he stood there, panting heavily with a bright red face of anger and humiliation, the robot threw back its head and laughed hard and mockingly. Sparkplug longed to punch the stupid robot right in face and wipe that sneering grin but self preservation barred him from doing that.

All he could do was stand there, fists clenched as the robot finally finished laughing.

"You're even feistier than I thought," the robot said, almost thoughtfully. "And here I thought all fleshings were spineless, worthless pieces of filth."

"Yeah?" Sparkplug growled. "And I thought all robots were all stupid, mindless pieces of junk only good for picking up trash."

The robot's expression suddenly turned nasty and Sparkplug knew he was in trouble.

"I'm going to enjoy snapping you in half," the robot growled but just as it started to reach for him, Spike's shrill voice suddenly hollered.

"Dad, there's more of them coming!"

"Huh?" exclaimed the robot in mild confusion as it twisted to look up at the sky where a new group was robots was heading right towards them.

"Aww, the Autobots," it groaned in exasperation as several of the other robots cried out in anger at the sight of this airborne group. "I thought we'd taken care of them for good."

Sparkplug had no idea who these new robots were but right now, he was grateful his captor's attention was diverted from him. He started to carefully move away from him, desperate to get to Spike and then get them both away. He'd only gone a few steps before the robot turned to face him.

"I'll be back for you," the robot said, pointing right at him although he made no move to grab him. "And that brat too, you watch your back, squishy."

Sparkplug felt the blood drain from his face but the robot was already turning away to charge towards the rest of his fellows. Sparkplug turned and saw that his son was lying under a beam which was pinning him to the ground. He didn't look too badly hurt but he clearly couldn't move from his position. Sparkplug quickly ran over and pulled his son out, hugging him tightly to his body.

"D-dad?" Spike stammered as the two groups of robots started shooting and shouting at each other. "W-what was he doing to you?"

"Nothing," Sparkplug said shortly, he didn't want to talk about it right now. "Come on, let's get out of here."

They started to run for it, even as the platform bucked and groaned around them. And finally collapsed into the boiling ocean where they were trapped until the Autobots eventually rescued them.

_Author's note. Heh, a silly chapter but you have to admit, it did look suspicious when Rumble pinned Sparkplug to that wall. Remember, suggestions are welcome._


End file.
